The Bosss Wife

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We must assume that Tim is at least vaguely aware that you help his wife with tasks, especially since your predecessor did the same thing. No — I don't have time. I can help Jan find a virtual assistant to care of everything she might need. That's my recommendation.

If Tim doesn't ask you whether you're okay being Jan's personal assistant as well as his, you will volunteer that information this way:. Tim: So, what's this green slice of the pie chart — "Jan's projects? You: That's right. Jan often asks me for help researching vendors, making party arrangements and so on. Tim: Okay. I didn't realize that. I guess she's mentioned talking with you once or twice.

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You: Yes, and actually it's good that we're talking about it because I'd like to propose that we handle Jan's requests slightly differently in I can find her a fantastic virtual assistant who will be able to take care of the tasks Jan needs help with, faster than I can. My first priority is this job, of course.

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I don't like to leave Jan hanging when she needs help but I have to do this job first. When you talk to Tim, you're not going to say "Jan is a pain in the neck" or "Why on earth did you marry that awful woman? You are going to set a boundary with Tim — in a pleasant, upbeat and professional way. It is in Tim's best interests as well as yours to erect a barrier between his work and his life at home.

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The next time Jan calls you, begin setting boundaries with her, too. If Tim wimps out and says "I like the virtual assistant idea, but let me check with Jan on that. Jan: So anyway Stacey, I want you to run an ad for me. I need a new nanny.

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I want you to write the ad and then send it to me to approve. I'll let you screen the resumes and set up the interviews.

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You: Hmmm. I'm just thinking. It might be better, before you run that ad for a new nanny, for me to help you find a virtual assistant to handle this sort of thing for you. My time has become so limited that if I take on a project like your nanny recruiting project, it could be several weeks before I can start. I don't want to make you wait, so it makes more sense to get you a fantastic virtual assistant to take care of all your administrative needs.

That way you won't have to wait until I have time to take care of your requests.

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The nanny recruiting project is a great way for you and your VA to start working together. You: I'm very busy here. The soonest I could begin working on that job ad would be the third week of February. Jan: Oh my gosh!


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  • I can't wait that long. Okay, let's get that virtual assistant. Get me somebody great! Some people in your situation, of course, would say "Forget this — if Tim can't keep his wife off my back what kind of leader is he?

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    Other people would say "I like the job, and I like Tim. I don't know anything about the dynamics between Tim and Jan. I don't know Jan's story, or what she has on her plate or what might be going on with her to make her so uptight and short-tempered.


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    • Once I get past this obstacle, this could be my dream job. The higher I got in the corporate world, the more operatic th She has run Temasek Holdings, the state-owned fund, since , and has presided over a spectacular series of misjudgments that have lost Singaporeans billions. Today, Singaporeans are sick of Ho and have been for some time. They want her out of Temasek, lest she create any more financial havoc for them. The big idea was that Goodyear would fix the mess Ho made in banking and tilt Singapore into the booming China and India growth stories, which meant placing Temasek at the middle of big regional resources plays.

      It seems clear that after five months hanging around the Temasek office, Goodyear has been paid millions for his life-long silence. But only a few days earlier, Goodyear was doing the rounds of Temasek satellites mapping out his vision. The implication was clear: Goodyear was a genuine businessperson whereas Ho was not. That was mid-July. A week later, Chip was chopped.

      So what happened? Too risky? What could be riskier than that?